Slumdog - But is this the real India? Not quite right!

I missed reviewing Slumdog. Sometimes you plan on doing some things and never end up doing… But, after Slumdog’s sweep of 8 Oscars, I decided to do it…

I did not like Slumdog. Or perhaps I should say I was not very impressed. Maybe it was all the hype, the Oscar buzz and the ‘It is sooooooo awesome’ first-person accounts I have heard over the last few weeks that led me to go into the theater with unrealistic expectations. Perhaps…

Although Slumdog has received rave reviews for its cinematography, the film doesn’t quite live up to its protagonist’s words 'You want to see the real India? Here it is!’ In Slumdog, there's a lot of exaggeration and harping on well-worn clichés about India. People live in garbage heaps. Hero jumps into a huge heap of human excreta and without batting an eyelid comes running out covered in brown slime. The hero, a Muslim, sees his family slaughtered by Hindu rioters and sees along with it a rioting kid dressed as lord Rama. The Hero is booked on the flimsiest of charges and then he is beaten black and blue in a police station. What else? Let’s see…. Child prostitution. Forced begging. Blinding of innocent children. Rape. Human filth. etc., etc., well, yes these things do happen in India. However the problem is when you show every hellish thing possible happening to the same person. Then it stretches reason and believability and just looks like you are packing in every negative thing that westerners perceive about India! Why? Is it because audiences and jury members feel good when their pre-conceived notions are confirmed?

Keeping aside Slumdog, let’s say I make a movie about the US of A where an African-American boy born in the hood, has his mother sell him to a pedophile pop icon, after which he gets molested by a priest from his church, following which he gets tied up to the back of a truck and dragged on the road by some clansmen. Then he is arrested and sodomized by a policeman with a rod, after which he is attacked by a gang of illegal immigrants, and then uses these life experiences to win ‘Beauty and the Geek’? Even though each of these incidents have actually happened in the US of A, I would be accused of spinning a fantastic yarn that has no grounding in reality, that has no connection to the ‘American experience’ and my motivations would be questioned, no matter how cinematically spectacular I make my movie!

Coming back to Slumdog, If there is anything unique about it, it’s the use of the millionaire game show device to further its plot (even though the links between the plot and the questions are tenuous and sometimes extremely artificial), which I believe is one of the primary reasons why people get caught up in the movie. The same reason they get caught up in reality shows like ‘Kaun Banega Crorepati’ and get up and cheer when a total stranger gets a crore bucks! I also don’t understand why the host of the show is shown heartlessly mocking the fact that the contestant is a humble ‘chaiwala’, I don’t think this kind of class-based running down will ever happen on any show!

There are too many things and bloopers you have to accept in order to enjoy Slumdog and prominent among the bloopers is its reference to the 15th century Hindu poet Surdas. The song 'Darshan Do Ghanshyam Nath Mori' sung by a blind beggar in the film as credited to the blind saint-poet Surdas, was actually penned by N S Nepali for a 1957 film called ‘Narsi Bhagat’.

Danny Boyle has constructed a fairytale with a dash of Indian exotica and a love story. Which means Slumdog has infinite license for taking liberties and surely Boyle has taken too many cinematic liberties by making the darkness darker in order to brighten the halo around the hero and heroine!

Slumdog might remain a memorable film for 8 Oscars and its cinematic brilliance. But is this the real India? Not quite right!

Dasvidaniya - clearly differentiates between living and surviving.

The protagonist Amar’s only excitement in life is making a to-do list every morning and then ticking off everything that he accomplishes at the end of the day. But unfortunately, destiny has some other plans stored for him. He comes to know through his doctor that he is suffering from stomach cancer and now only has just three months left to live. Amar has so many unfulfilled dreams left! He then sets about making a new to do list of 10 things. His last list of all the things he has to do before he dies. From making a foreign trip to telling his childhood love about his affections for her to meeting his best friend with whom he has lost contact. The film follows Amar’s journey towards fulfilling his wishes which also take him nearer to his death.

The ever-demanding nature of human beings is very obviously put forth by Amar’s ever increasing list. It tells something about ourselves when every time an item is checked off the list there are a few unchecked ones glaring at you. And as you see that, you find Amar taking a pause to just stand and stare - something that brings him immense pleasure. Dasvidaniya is one of those rarities that bring a smile that refuses to go while a tear rolls down. The dark humor too helps in keeping that smile. The hero of the movie is a common man and somewhere everyone can relate to it because there is not a single faked moment. It is a bitter-sweet story about a man who refused to die before he had learnt to live.

Completely, character driven, the charm of the film lies in its simplicity of its theme and its wonderfully etched characters. The screenplay is well woven with some moments that carry the power to remain etched in your memory even long after the film is over. Returning to the ambit of the dull working class protagonist that he almost patented in Bheja Fry Vinay Pathak delivers yet another bravura performance as a man who learns to live only when he learns he has to die. Vinay Pathak gets the sur of the tragic hero's comic escapades just right. He's partly Charlie Chaplin, and partly Robert Benigni. But finally this is an actor who does his own thing. The film is a must see for Vinay Pathak’s absolutely brilliant performance. First timer Shashant Shah has handled this sensitive slice-of-life cinema with a rare maturity.

All that glitters is not gold and that aptly applies to Fashion.

While a ‘Sex and the City’ and ‘The Devil wears Prada’ has the element of fashion and eccentricity ooze from every corner, a film like ‘Gia’ had powerful characters. The idea behind mentioning these films is not to bring a sense of comparison, but to highlight elements that seem missing in ‘Fashion’. Having watched Bhandarkar’s other movies, in ‘Fashion’ I felt he has not covered new ground, and instead of giving new insights into the world of fashion, he ends up strengthening the stereotypes.

The showstopper garment as a norm is always the last garment to be showcased in any fashion show across the world but in ‘Fashion’ the garment is showcased in the start of the fashion show! The front row of any fashion show consists of buyers from abroad, influential fashion editors, moneyed customers and fashion institute students but in ‘Fashion’ we have gay designers, modeling agency owner with his wife, floozies etc., Coming to the fashion designers in the film, all the male designers are gay! In one of his interview Bhandarkar claimed that he does a lot of ‘research’ for his films but sadly, it is all very obnoxiously superficial. The film is full of ad agency / fashion magazine honchos calling the shots, wild lifestyles, backstage dramas, wardrobe malfunction, casting couch... ouch, ouch, ouch!

All’s not bad in ‘Fashion’, the production design, costumes, styling are truly up market and a feast for the eyes, music is well synchronized with the lilting 'Mar Jaava' and 'Jalwa' as highlights. There are two major sequences that are simply outstanding. One, Kangana's wardrobe malfunction and two, when Priyanka exposes Arbaaz to his wife Suchitra Pillai. Apart from these the only other good things while watching the film were the comments audience were hurling at the film out of sheer boredom. The running time of almost 2 hours 40 minutes makes one restless, especially the penultimate 45-odd minutes.

Kangana Ranaut shows that she is one person who can get into the skin of the character and raised the bar with a superb performance, just outstanding. The thing that struck me most was the way Kangna did her role, the crazy part would have been easy for her since she has done such roles earlier also but the modelling part was what surprised me as she did look like a real model. Mugda is just about ok. But the movie ‘Fashion’ belongs to Priyanka Chopra, she is in the screen 90 percent of the time, and she is unimpressive to say the least and doesn’t even look the supermodel she is supposed to be.

Drona and Kidnap are a big letdown!

Drona and Kidnap are big film in all respects - big stars, big canvas, big expenditure, big ad spend, big expectations. Sadly, they are a big, big, big letdown as well and people are already comparing these films to the recent supreme disasters like Saawariya, RGV Ki Aag and Love Story 2050 or the all time classic disasters like Razia Sultan or Roop ki Rani Choron ka Raja.

In Drona there are a few sequences that are executed with style like when Kay Kay turns Jaya Bachchan into a statue, the train sequence, Kay Kay dragging Priyanka to his yacht and the petal storm. Apart from these awe-inspiring sequences Drona rests on a wafer thin plot and a sloppy, slipshod and messy screenplay!

Kidnap is nowhere near Dhoom and Dhoom-2 the two previous directorial ventures of Sanjay Gadhvi that bring a cauldron of expectations. I never expected such a ridiculous piece of work from the same director! Probably the difference here is that Aditya Chopra and the YRF banner is not around this time. Kidnap has nothing to offer more than disappointments and it's a great disaster. I had read somewhere that Gadhavi feels Imran Khan’s performance in this film reminds him of Marlon Brando! Brando must be turning upside down in his grave! As a viewer in the theatre, you too will probably agree when Imran Khan proclaims, ‘Hell is right here!’.

I think Directors like Behl and Gadhvi should realize that movie-goers have stopped appreciating inane ideas.

25 Romantic movies from Hollywood

I personally think the Koreans make the most touching romantic movies. Most of them are a must watch for anyone who loves Love. But romance in Hollywood movies seems to have been replaced by car chases and special effects. Still a good love story from Hollywood will always work with the audience. I consider the following twenty five Hollywood movies to be the ‘most romantic’ I have seen. The list is in no particular order of preference…

When Harry Met Sally - Starring: Billy Crystal, Meg Ryan.

You've Got Mail - Starring: Tom Hanks, Meg Ryan.

Moulin Rouge - Starring: Nicole Kidman, Ewan McGregor.

Dirty Dancing - Starring: Jennifer Grey, Patrick Swayze.

Love Actually - Starring: Hugh Grant, Bill Nighy, Gregor Fisher.

Somewhere in Time - Starring: Christopher Reeve, Jane Seymour.

An Affair To Remember- Starring: Cary Grant, Deborah Kerr.

Serendipity - Starring: John Cusack, Kate Beckinsale.

City of Angels - Starring: Nicolas Cage, Meg Ryan.

Love & Basketball - Starring: Sanaa Lathan, Omar Epps.

Romeo & Juliet - Starring: Leonardo DiCaprio, Claire Danes.

An Officer and a Gentleman - Starring: Richard Gere, Debra Winger.

Gone With The Wind - Starring: Clark Gable, Vivien Leigh.

Love Story - Starring: Ali MacGraw, Ryan O'Neal.

Sleepless in Seattle - Starring: Tom Hanks, Meg Ryan.

A Walk To Remember - Starring: Shane West, Mandy Moore.

Pretty Woman - Starring: Richard Gere, Julia Roberts.

Ghost - Starring: Patrick Swayze, Demi Moore.

Titanic - Starring: Leonardo DiCaprio, Kate Winslet.

The Notebook - Starring: Tim Ivey, Gena Rowlands.

Meet Joe Black – Starring : Brad Pitt, Claire Forlani.

My Big Fat Greek Wedding – Starring : John Corbett, Nia Vardalos.

A Walk in the Clouds – Starring : Keanu Reeves, Aitana Sanchez-Gijon.

The Run Away Bride – Starring : Julia Roberts, Richard Gere.

Sweet Home Alabama – Starring : Reese Witherspoon, Josh Lucas, Patrick Dempsey.

Have I missed any films worth mentioning?